Help Wanted

Little People Classified

WANTED! Person must be willing to:

mop floors,
dust,
vacuum,
sweep,
wipe little noses and butts,
kiss countless boo-boos,
act as referee for WWE wrestling (except the wrestlers are smaller with less muscles....and meaner),
watch countless hours of Handy Manny and other various Spanish speaking cartoon characters,
yell at the dog,
tame the people jumping from furniture,
play ball (sometimes with no warning until the aforementioned ball hits you in the head), drink lots of coffee,
endure LOTS AND LOTS of laundry,
read 7, 685 books,
water flowers,
cook meals,
coax little people into eating said meals,
clean up after people after they don't eat said meals,
yell at the dog,
wipe more noses and butts,
check on neighbor who just gave birth to beautiful baby girl,
DON'T eat chocolate,
DON'T yell (it scares the little people),
replace batteries in 456 noisy toys that all decided to stop working on the same day

Salary: More kisses and hugs than you can imagine from two of the cutest little people you've ever laid eyes on, snuggles and smiles from those same LP, Kisses from the most Handsome Big Daddy on the planet, sloppy licks from a cute puppy, occasionally a nap when the LP decide they're tired.

Sound like a job you're interested in? Well, too bad! It's taken. This is my job and I'm rather fond of it. Also, this is a list of things I need to do today so I'd best be off! Anything you want to add that's included in your job description?