Friday, January 13, 2012

Mama's Got a New Look

Not really Mama so much as Mama's blog.

If you are on a feed reader, click on over and tell me what you think. I
was ready for something newer, brighter and more me. The old look was,
three years ago? Yikes. I need to keep up.

Since it's Friday, let's do some catching up, shall we?

1} We are gearing up for a long weekend here. We have our kids in an
American school here and one of the biggest reasons we picked that over putting
them in the local British schools was because we wanted them to have the same
holidays that J. would have. That way, when we have US only holidays like MLK
and Columbus Day, we can take a long weekend to travel as a family. That said,
I have no idea yet if we will go anywhere this weekend. Because.....

2} Our family has been passing around a stomach virus this week and bless
his heart, it's Keller's turn today. I'm praying (HARD) that Caroline doesn't
get it. I'd rather have it twice than have her get it. There's nothing worse
than a baby having a stomach virus. It's just pitiful.

3} I need my hair colored in the worst way. I actually found a salon here
that I love but to get my basic highlights done there, it's a minimum of a three
hour appointment. Boys and girls, I just don't have that kind of time on my
hands. Therefore, I'm going to be completely gray headed by approximately
6:30PM EST.

4} I might have mentioned a time or twelve that I miss Target. I'm sorry
to repeat myself but y'all, what I wouldn't give to shop some orange sticker
clearance at the Big Red Bullseye. To add insult to injury, they don't ship to
APO (that's US military postal service for you non-mil types) so I can't even
shop online. Bah.

5} I don't really have a number five but it seems better to end on 5 than
4. Kind of like David Letterman never does a Top 9 list. Just doesn't have the
same ring.

Oh wait, I do have something else. I am thinking I might give Ms.
Mel another chance because today, I can actually walk without tears. I'll
let you know if we make up.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Scary Spice. Living Up to Her Name.

I got this for Christmas:

Photo From Google
Y'all. Scary Spice is kicking my tail. I started one of her workouts yesterday and halfway through, I quit. I didn't say goodbye or thank you for your help, I just straight up turned off the game and limped walked away.
Once my heart rate slowed to that of a person being chased by a rabid dog, I thought, "Dang. That girl is good."
Today, as I got out of bed and realized that I'd be taking baby steps all day due to an inability to bend my legs, I thought, "Dang. I hate that girl."
I know I tend to lean towards the dramatic side when I tell stories but I'm toning down the drama when I tell you that as I tried to shave my legs in the shower, I had to all but skip my calves because the pressure of a Venus Embrace was equivelent to rolling around naked on a bed of broken glass. With tiny sharp rocks sprinkled on top.
All this from half a work out. I'm a special kind of out of shape. The kind that may just be beyond hope.
J. has been doing the workouts since I got the game and after the first day, he had the same problems even though he's in significantly better shape than I am.
First, let me say, I'm sorry I made fun of him for the fact that he got whooped by a Spice Girl. However, I'm not as sorry as I was because he now thinks himself an expert and tried to convince me that I needed to do the workout again today to loosen up those sore muscles. As if.
If I could move my leg, I'd kick him. Apparently, he missed my old lady shuffle around the house today and didn't hear me moaning when I tried to sit down. (Or stand up.)

I will work out with you again, Mel. I find you so much more tolerable than most women on work out videos and much less frightening than Jilllian Michaels. In fact, when I was working out, I felt like we were friends. Except for the fact that I'm pretty sure friends don't do to each other what you did to me yesterday rendering me unable to move today.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

A Trip Down Picture Lane

I was just browsing some recent pictures before I start a new folder for 2012 (WHAT the WHAT?) and here are a few that I love.
We went to Blenheim Palace back in November and while we were there, our friends introduced us to the awesome world of geocaching. During our hunt, we found this huge tree that has a giant hole in the middle....the perfect size for kids to play and pose.
I thought this sign was hilarious. Apparently, I'm a weirdo because as I was cracking up, everyone else was like, "Yeah,, it's kinda funny..."

The next couple are from Kenilworth Castle. It's a beautiful ruin that we were able to visit a couple of months ago. Our kids had no idea that there is anything special about them playing tag with their friends in the shadow of a 900 year old castle. You know, just everyday fun.
Here is the most recent picture taken of me.

Ha ha! Just kidding but isn't he cute? We went to a drive through safari park and the monkey section is one wild ride. This guy hopped on our hood and pretty much used us as his way from one side of the park to the other. We got a kick out of him. Thankfully, we don't have an external antennae on our car because the car in front of us did and they left the monkey park with only half of an antennae.
As is any normal two year old, Caroline is obsessed with Elmo. She's all about anything with the little red guy's face on it. Imagine our delight when we heard that USO was doing a Sesame Street Live tour on our base!! We knew how much she would love it so we made sure to get there early.
The tour manager heard how much she loves Elmo and came out to get us before the show. He set up a special meeting for our girl with her favorite fuzzy red monster. We waited backstage while he went to retrieve E-L-M-O. We were all so giddy to see her reaction and because we were so excited, she was excited. Even though looking back, it's clear that she had no idea what she was so excited about because the second he rounded the corner and headed her way, she FREAKED HER FREAK OUT. She was holding on to me for dear life and screaming her head off. Poor Elmo backed away and stood in the corner waiting for her to warm up.
When she was settled, we knew the only way she'd pose with Elmo would be in a group shot. With her posse around her, she felt less threatened by the monster and she seemed calm, yet still very suspicious.
Until he put his arm around me for the picture and his (giant) fuzzy hand touched her. It was over. THE END.
This is the best picture we got and I know this makes me a horrible mom but this picture tickles me to no end.

C'mon. It's straight up Sesame Street in Crazy Town. Brother's bank robber bandanna, Sister hiding behind something because she's stuck with a sit-com family, J's crazed "take the picture and run" look and me laughing so hard I can't stand it. Two people (one people, one monster) not laughing? Caroline and Elmo. I think both will be needing therapy after this encounter.